Let Them Eat….Cake Batter!

Published by Santa Claus on

Who likes Christmas cake? Johann? Taylor? Claude? Stephanie?

Well I certainly love Christmas cake, especially with a large mug of hot and spicy egg nog. Sadly, it seems we may have a shortage this year due to a pair of wayward spectacles in the batter.

Dingus Winkel-Rod, who used to work in the ‘Wheelie Cool Mobility Bureau’ before asking to be promoted to dried fruit inspector, accidentally dropped his glasses in one of the giant vats of batter. The whole factory has to be shut down while specialist retrieval elves wore scuba suits while trying to locate the glasses. In the end all the batter was spoiled, which means there may not be enough Christmas cake for everyone this year.

Of course Dingus feels bad, but he suggested Battenberg cake may be a better option for most people, especially as it’s tastier and goes better with hot, coconut milk.

I know what I’ll be getting Dingus for Christmas! In any case the batter will not be wasted. We, in the North Pole, are very interested in gardening and finding ways to help nature along. So, Melvin Green-Fir, chief elf in charge of the Christmas tree nurseries is going to use the batter as mulch. The only problem is the batter smells horrible, so all the greenhouse elves have to wear nose plugs!

(They keep getting their nose plus wrapped up in their moustaches, which is making many of them cranky – Ho! Ho! Ho!)

I am disappointed I still haven’t been able to take any test flights. Apparently there is some kind of creepy, snow monster by the sleigh hanger.

Speak soon. Be good.

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